Dear World,

In these moments of darkness, I crave for light, so I search it with my camera.


March 16, Romania declares state of emergency. It’s also the day when all our plans fall apart. On April 2nd my partner Tomas would have flown from Belgium to Romania. We would have taken our two cats and start our journey together, driving from Cluj, Romania to our new home in Antwerp, Belgium.

I met Tomas 5 years ago in Romania while he was working on his master’s photo project in the Carpathian Mountains. From our first year of long distance I gathered a bag full with letters, photos, matchboxes, photo festival flyers, straws and silly drawings that we mailed to each other. I call it the bag of our beginnings, which I keep to remember the beauty and the longing of our long distance relationship.

After Tomas finished his masters, he moved to Cluj, Romania to be with me. On December 2019, Tomas receives a job offer to coordinate ‘De Facktorij,’ an art collective in Zoersel, Belgium. This opened opportunities but also brought big fears for me. So after months of debates, trying to imagine every possible scenario, of both staying and leaving Romania, we finally decided to take this opportunity and switch countries and cultures.

On February 12th, Tomas jumped on the bus to Brussels to start his new job. I stayed in Cluj to pack the rest of the things and wait until April when our apartment in Antwerp became available to move in.

May 16, Romania declares state of alert; some of the constraints are lifted. I feel relieved until I hear on the radio that travelling to Belgium is still not possible at least for 14 days.

Today I live with my parents. I moved out from our apartment in Cluj to Medias. My parents have an amazing garden and a small farm that brings some extra income for the family. This garden is my haven, and spring made my home bloom. We live together with nature. Nothing goes to waste and everything seems to have meaning here. Only I struggle to find meaning, to see the end of this. In these moments of darkness, I crave for light, so I search it with my camera until reality gets stripped of any meaning and it becomes raw emotions. Only then I feel like I can start building something new that makes sense and feels less like a dream.

Nothing lasts forever.

Before this sentence, “nothing lasts forever” would make me sad.

Now, it is one of the only things that give me hope. Nothing lasts forever in life, and everything has an end, and hopefully soon I will be reunited with my partner again.


I Didn’t Know There Is A Love Like That

Support this photographer: Roxi Pop ︎  @roxipopphoto


About the photographer: I am a documentary freelance photographer based in Medias, Romania.


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